gratitude

What is it about a hot drink that lends itself so readily to self reflection and self realization?

Help yourself to an attitude of gratitude in the form of self reflection and self realization. Wrap your hands around a warm mug of spiced cider that you take time to sip slowly from a rocker on the front porch.

Don’t have a front porch? Take a walk to your favorite downtown coffee house, and sit and sip on a bench outside the shop. Take some time for self reflection as the beautiful leaves cascade to the ground in their shades of crimson and gold.

Feeling like being with a friend? Make a date to meet for tea or coffee, cocoa or chai. Relax and let the conversation drift where it may. Give each other the gift of comfortable silence if that’s your momentary pleasure.

Pour a cup of warm cocoa for the kids after school. Electronics off; senses on. Have everyone sit together, maybe at the breakfast nook of your cozy kitchen.

If you grow a garden, then you probably know about “hardening off.” This is when you take young plants that have only been subjected to the warmth of a greenhouse or protective indoor shelter under grow lights, and bring them outdoors for a few hours each day. You’re supposed to do this for increasing lengths of time, until the newly matured plants are strong enough to withstand the elements on their own. Once your plants are fully hardened off, they’re ready to be planted outside in your garden beds.

If you think about the phrase “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” you’ll see how it applies to garden plants and also to people.

The plants that are subjected to increasingly harsh conditions slowly over time are much more likely to survive than plants that have only known the cushy existence of a sheltered life under grow lights.

People, too, become more resilient after facing difficult experiences that cause them to develop survival skills and grow emotionally.

If you think you’ve had a tough life, or if you think you’ve been dealt a bad hand or made some poor decisions, consider this: you’ve survived thus far. You’ve been “hardened off” by life, and you’re all the tougher for it.

Tougher doesn’t have to mean developing a coarse or mean personality. Tough can simply mean that you now have a thicker skin, in a way that things which may have bothered you before don’t seem to be much of a big deal now.

Or, things that once seemed overwhelming and impossible to manage, now seem easy because you’ve developed coping strategies that work for you.

They call this maturity, and it’s something to have an attitude of gratitude about for sure.

Exercise: Get an Attitude of Gratitude About The Tough Times

You may not feel especially grateful for the hardships you’ve faced in life. Maybe you never seem to have enough money. Maybe your marriage hasn’t been all moonlight and roses, and in fact sometimes you’re downright angry about that.

But instead of dwelling on the negative experiences of the past, step outside of your emotional self. Identify ways that you’ve found to handle people and events that have challenged you mentally, physically and emotionally.

Think about unexpected life lessons that you’ve been dealt from people who have changed you for the better even as they challenged you.

Journal it. Writing things down can provide clarity. If you want to develop an attitude of gratitude for your life’s experiences, especially the tough ones, then write them out. Tell your story, even if only to yourself.

Compare the ways in which you opted to handle problems in the past, versus how you tend to manage things now. What’s different? Have you managed to work things out in a way that’s favorable? That’s something to be grateful for – your own natural resilience.

Attitude of Gratitude – Day 5: A Cup of Self-Reflection

Are you making it your personal goal to close out the year with an Attitude of Gratitude? This is a perfect activity to broaden your mindset and invite more positivity into your life during the Thanksgiving season.

One way to have an attitude of gratitude is by practicing purposeful living. This can be one of the hardest things to do, especially in our fast-paced world where electronics seem to make demands on us every second of every day.

Remember that you are allowed to shut out the constant clamoring of a demanding life. In fact – it’s really bad for your health not to.

Below, find some stress statistics from Statistic Brain:

U.S. Stress Statistics	Data
Percent of people who regularly experience physical symptoms caused by stress	77 %
Regularly experience psychological symptoms caused by stress	73 %
Feel they are living with extreme stress	33 %
Feel their stress has increased over the past five years	48 %

The key to slowing down is by committing to the following:

Stop allowing technology to rule your life. Decide when it’s time to check email and messages, not the other way around. Don’t fall into the trap of liking and adding emoticons to everything you see on social media. Go for quality, not quantity, in your online communication.

Learn to say “no.” When we try to please everybody, we end up pleasing no one, least of all ourselves. Quality suffers. We make more mistakes, and we find ourselves spread too thin which is frustrating. If your commitments have begun to seem more like a burden and a hassle than a way to give of yourself in a way that feels good and rewarding, that means you’ve overbooked yourself. You’ll find joy in your life’s work when you take the time to do things right, and say no to all the rest.

Give your mate, children and friends the gift of your full attention. Look people in the eyes as they’re speaking to you. Listen to their whole story without giving in to the urge to interrupt. Even if you’re someplace like the park, or a restaurant, where attention is often divided, put down your phone. Being stuck in the virtual world of social media and online information is exactly the opposite of staying fully present.

Spend time in nature, every day. If you have a dog, take him or her outside for a walk, maybe even two of them. It doesn’t have to be a long excursion, just 15 minutes around the block is all you need. When you have a few hours of free time, head to the park or take a hike down a sunlit path through the woods. Don’t be one of those people who hears the weather report and decides to hole up indoors under artificial light. A little rain, cold and snow is good for the body and soul. Be grateful for the goodness of our planet.

Exercise: Slow Down. Find Ways to Be Grateful.

Learning to live in the moment is the key to being grateful. Stop rushing. Instead, breathe. Open your mind to the many delicious sensations of a single experience.

If you find it difficult to slow down, you may need a release of some sort to clear your head and allow you to focus. Engage in some light stretching, do yoga, or go for a short jog to help relieve stress.

After you’ve exercised, enjoy a cool and refreshing drink of water. Then, allow your mind to take you on leisurely journey of the senses.

To do this, pick a single experience. It might be heading to the park with your small child. Children are naturally gifted at staying in the present. It could be playing ball with your dog in the backyard. Maybe it’s just doing something by yourself, like sitting by a quiet stream and simply relaxing with your thoughts.

Whatever you do, take time to notice everything. Open your eyes and ears. Tune in your sense to the world around you.

Journal it. Living in the present moment really lends itself to writing something beautiful. Whatever your pleasure-centered activity may be, plan to write about it afterward. You don’t have to follow with immediate journaling if that doesn’t work for your schedule. You can do the quiet activity, then let the experience digest in your mind as the day’s remaining events unfold. When you’re ready, write down what you saw, heard, smelled, even tasted. Talk about how it made you feel. What are you grateful for, in that precious moment?

An attitude of gratitude comes easy when we stop to focus our full attention on the beauty of this world and all its gifts!

Attitude of Gratitude Day – Day 4: What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger

To cultivate an attitude of gratitude starts with being able to see the positive. Of course, some things are obviously a plus – like a free lunch, a beautiful day, a perfect parking spot or an unexpected check in the mail. It’s easy to be grateful for those little moments that bring us joy.

What’s a little more difficult is being able to see the good in an adverse situation. Sometimes you might feel like everything’s going wrong. You don’t have enough to pay the credit card bill this month. Your child got in trouble in school today. You had to say goodbye to a beloved pet. The checkout lines at Wal-mart seemed to take forever.

More and more, it seems like people are ready to jump in with a criticism or negative remark. We have the social media outlets for immediate gratification. Someone got on your last nerve today? Broadcast it on Facebook and talk about how angry you feel and how they inconvenienced you.

Try to accentuate the positive in these situations.

The credit card bill went up, but it’s only because you had to get the car fixed. At least now the car will be running smoothly so you can get where you need to go. At least you have a credit card. Some people aren’t even allowed to borrow money from banks. You know you’ll do a good job getting this paid off in a timely fashion.

Your child got in trouble at school, but he or she has responded positively to correction. You know that tomorrow is another day, and a chance to do better. You’ve handled the problem responsibly and fairly, and didn’t fly off the handle. You’re doing the right thing as a parent, and your hard work will pay off in the long run.

You lost your best friend – the family dog. But he was up there in years, and poor health had taken its toll on his quality of life. Now your precious pup is in a better place, and free of pain. It hurts to say goodbye, but time heals all. The dog had a good life. You’ll cherish the memories.

Yes, the lines at Wal-mart seemed to take forever today. But you still got what you needed, you saved money, and you made it out of there in time to get to your appointment. So, not a bad day on the whole!

Exercise: Find the Pearl.

Discover the positive in a negative experience.

Next time you feel like complaining, stop and consider if it’s justified. Instead of letting one minor annoyance become a giant gripe session or self-pity-fest, take the difficulty for what it is: something that, while irritating, also made you think and perhaps even caused you to learn something.

A better and more productive exercise for the long term might just be to teach yourself to see the good even through the hard times and petty annoyances of daily life.

A flat tire made you late for work? Yes, but a nice person stopped to offer roadside assistance. You didn’t get into a car wreck. You needed new tires anyway, and now you can check this task off your list.

You gained five pounds on your so-called diet? Yes, but you threw some wonderful family parties and cooked delicious food, and you’ll do better with your weight loss goals starting on Monday.

Journal it. Surely there will be at least one thing that gets on your nerves each day. Instead of slipping into a pessimistic mindset, search for the underlying lesson. What did you learn? What good thing may come of this experience? Having an attitude of gratitude means digging deeper to find the gold.

Attitude of Gratitude Day 3: Slow Down. Take Time to Appreciate

Thanksgiving is just around the corner. Are you moving into a attitude of gratitude mindset? What does it mean to have an attitude of gratitude? It’s about appreciation for all of life’s gifts. No matter what your circumstance, there is always something to be thankful for. In fact, studies have shown that ruminating on the positive increases feel-good brain chemicals which is good for your health as well as your relationships.

Like most things, we tend to attract whatever we put out into the universe. So if you’re in the mindset of being grateful for all you’ve got, then you’re opening the door for even more good fortune, wonderful people and promising opportunities to come your way.  Remember too, that even though you may think your situation is bad, it could be much worst.

Just like the early American settlers enjoyed the culmination of their hard work in the form of a huge celebratory meal, Thanksgiving is the time of year when we reflect on all the good things we’ve been bestowed, and the people who matter most to us.

If you’d like to increase positivity in your own life, cultivating an attitude of gratitude is a great place to begin. Instead of just saying one thing you’re thankful for around the holiday table, why not take it to the next level, and practice an attitude of gratitude in all of your daily doings?

Exercise: Trying on an Attitude of Gratitude

You may not be used to looking at the world around you through optimistic eyes. If you’re not, that’s okay. This exercise is meant to help you grow and increase your awareness of the world and all of its wonder. That doesn’t happen without concerted effort.

Start with something simple. Just like any goal, it takes practice to turn a new way of thinking into habit. If you’re used to griping and complaining, then you might just kick off your attitude of gratitude by thinking of one thing to be thankful for each day.

You can do this exercise at any point in the day that feels right for you. If you’re not a morning person and tend to feel grumpy until you’ve had your coffee, then don’t force a positive mental outlook until you’re awake and mentally warmed up.

Or, if at the end of the day you tend to feel wiped out and weary, then don’t force the attitude of gratitude exercise at this time. Perhaps a mid-day reflection or some quiet time in the afternoon will bring out the positive in you.

This exercise is supposed to make you feel happy and satisfied… not like a chore that you’re obligated to attend to because someone told you to.

So, when all conditions are right for opening the door to positive thinking, ask yourself: what good things happened today? What do I have to be thankful for?

Start journaling. If you feel it, write it down. A written journal can help you on your path to self discovery and see what positive changes come about simply by having an “attitude of gratitude.”

Click Here for Attitude of Gratitude Day 2: Accentuate the Positive